Final Girl: Are you ready for tomorrow?

If I have any readers left after this post, 'twill be a miracle.

(idea shamelessly pinched from The Retropolitan's Tales to Astonish!, an electro-mag you really should be reading)

It's unanimous!

"Candid, sarcastic, snarky, and fun." - Rue Morgue

"A Dorothy Parker-esque droll wit and wisdom unrivaled in 99% of the blogosphere." - Matthew Kiernan, AMC Monsterfest

"If there were two Stacie Ponders, the world would be a better place." - Richard Harland Smith, TCM's Movie Morlocks

"I want to marry this girl!" - Scott Weinberg, Cinematical

"The greatest horror site in...what the hell...the world!" - Kim Morgan, MSN Movies Filter

"The most fun you can have on a horror blog." - Adam Ross, DVD Panache

"Arguably the most clever film blogger online." - DK Holm, The Screengrab

"You are little more than a diseased piece of waste. There's nothing even remotely relevant about you...pathetic." - A reader

"Like most of McDonald's loving Americans, you have a lack of insight..." - Barry

A handy FAQ for Google searchers!

1. Whomever was searching for "bea arthur haunted house"...if you find it, let me know where it is.
2. Yes, most likely the girl at the end of The Descent would soon be dead. Or she may have just gone crazy, depending on which ending you saw.
3. No, you will not find photos of a girl masturbating on a dryer here.
4. Whomever is looking for "booll woob sex girle", I can't help you.
5. That "horror film with a hot girl" you're looking for is probably this one, in particular the first segment.
6. "Nosferatu's female name" is Nosferatina.
7. Dear whoever found me by Googling "episode of Dallas where Sue Ellen got totally drunk and fell down the stairs"...will you marry me?
8. I have no idea whether or not Genie Francis has had plastic surgery.