...the 8-year-old Scarlett Johansson! WOW! I have no idea how it was done, casting the 8-year-old Scarlett Johansson in this flick (there must have been some time travel and shit and I'm sorry but science is totally hard), but by gum it's certainly a coup for Mr. Zombie and Company. Hooray!
In case you didn't know, Christmas is coming up fast. That's right, I'm pretty sure it falls on December 25, which is wicked soon. If you don't know what to ask for or you don't know what to buy that special someone, don't fret. There's a new Special Edition of the original Black Christmas out there waiting for you to take it home! Again, I say, perhaps I should just wait until I'm on my deathbed to buy DVDs so as to insure I get the most super wicked awesome ultimate edition of whatever movie. I thought my Collector's Edition was good enough, but nooOOOooo...here comes the "Special" "Edition" with new interviews and commentaries and blah blah blah. Whatever. Has the "Special" "Edition" been Touched By A Margot Kidder? Probably not. I still want it, though. I'm totally trying to be all zen and like nonmaterialistic and shit and not like, you know, want stuff and whatever, but still. This review of the new edition at Fangoria has me all drooling.
Oh, and if Christmas comes and goes and you find yourself all like "Oh fuck, I totes forgot to buy a present for my bitchy old Aunt Peggy!"...well, hush that cryin', child, for The Descent hits store shelves on December 26. Aren't you excited? I am. I'd sort of forgotten about that movie, and I'm all a-twitter to watch it again.
Now, I can forgive your forgetting about your bitchy old Aunt Peggy, but I'll never EVER forgive you if you forget to enter my
DAZZLING CURTAINS GIVEAWAY SWEEPSTAKES!
It won't matter, though, because I know you simply won't be able to forgive yourself. For shame!
Remember people, all you have to do to get a chance to win a VHS copy of the 1983 slasher flick Curtains, all you have to do is send me an email at email@example.com with the subject line Donna Martin Graduates! by midnight, December 30- see how easy I make it for you? And no, sending me money and gifts won't increase your chances of winning.
And by "won't increase your chances of winning", of course I mean "well, anything is possible so you'd might as well send me money and gifts just in case".