FINAL GIRL explores the slasher flicks of the '70s and '80s...and all the other horror movies I feel like talking about, too. This is life on the EDGE, so beware yon spoilers!

Feb 27, 2008

diminishing returns

I try as best I can to shy away from posting useless news item after useless news item about films in production (or pre-production, as the case may be). Sometimes tidbits get me amped and I don't want to spoil anything for myself (see: Silent Hill), and sometimes there's simply an information overload as new, pointless minutiae is released daily on MySpace or something (see: Rob Zombie's Halloween). Either way, the less I know, the better- and speculation is just an exercise in frustration until you see the finished product.

Sometimes, though, you just say to yourself...COME ON.


Today, Bloody-Disgusting posted some (alleged) details about...sigh...The De2cent, the forthcoming sequel to Neil Marshall's caving-expedition-gone-awry flick you may have heard of before. I mean, it's not like I've ever mentioned it before. But anyway, back in the heady days of July the film was announced and I did a bit of ruminating on the plot possibilities:
Will another group of hapless cavers get trapped and eaten underground? Will a group of paramilitary commandos head into the caves to do battle with the crawlers? Will the crawlers emerge from the dark depths and wreak havoc above ground? Will they try to assimilate in a wacky fish-out-of-water style comedy? The possibilities are endless!
Rumor has it that the creators of The De2cent (man, I hate typing that) are taking the Aliens approach. Quoth the B-D:
Shauna Macdonald's character of Sarah returns as a rescue crew finds her and takes her back into the cave to find survivors - where terror ensues once again. We've also been tipped that in the sequel you'll get to see "little" cave monsters in action.
I just...I can't...I have to remember to breathe. Who knows what the film will be when all is said and done? Still...I have to say...I'm not terribly excited beyond the fact that Shauna Macdonald rocked the house in the first film and I'll be happy to see her on screen again. But...it kind of defies all logic, doesn't it? Even Ripley didn't want to go back into the fire- is Sarah, who's a tad bit completely cuckoo nutso at the end of The Descent, really going to return to the cave to look for survivors- especially considering that she knows that all her friends are dead and there are no survivors? Ah, well. Again, speculating like this is an exercise in frustration.

However, what little we know for sure doesn't bode well either, at least in my opinion. It was known from the get-go that Neil Marshall wouldn't be directing, but now it seems he won't be writing, either. And supposedly Lionsgate isn't interested in distributing the film, which kind of boggles the mind. Wasn't The Descent a success for them? Given some of the shit that Lionsgate does distribute, their turning it down is a big red flag. Yet again,
speculating like this is an exercise in frustration, and we'll just have to wait and see. These tidbits, however, are leaving me decidedly unamped.


20 comments:

Ryne said...

That title for the movie is ridiculously horrendous.

Nate Y. said...

It's also possibly that Lionsgate doesn't have a "first look" option on the sequel and that the producers are hoping to get a bigger company to back them, since the first was such a success.

The Filth said...

:( leave good movies alone hollywood!

plot for the d3sc3nt:
sarah has made friends with the creatures after the wacky adventures of the de2cent, and when a pesky park ranger comes and tries to clear out their hidey-hole, all manner of hijinx ensue!

the "little cave monsters" will put traps all around the cave a la home alone, and sarah and the lead creature will have all kinds of "relevant" quips and banter.

Anonymous said...

I rented the first Desent and watched it at a friends. Both of my friends were making fun of it the entire time, laughing and such. At first I was annoyed... like, damnit, I'm trying to watch this movie... and then I realized, wait, it's actually not very good, is it? It's weird. Because it looks good... like the people making it bent over backwards for it to be good... but let's face it, the idea is unoriginal and there are no real scares. It's an F-ing action movie, not a "horror" movie, or whatever. The last scene with ghosty-whosty or whatever that was showed some potential, but it was a teeny little blurb that amounted to nothing and... let's face it again, made zero sense. The sequel will probably suck just like the first one did, only worse.

Same thing with this movie The Rage I rented last night. Rave reviews, everybody loved it... it looked great, Misty Mundae was great... and I didn't get scared once. See, I put in the original Day of the Dead, and that movie STILL makes me jump, even though I know when the scares are coming. The last scary movie I saw was Blair Witch, and the 6th sense, although in hindsight that movie blows.

Bill Walsh said...

St4cie,

As always, it comes down to the script. There are ways to finesse Sarah's insanity—perhaps it's some months later and she's been stabilized in an institution, and the feds or whoever need her to take them back down. Except, of course, she's still totally insane underneath and has her own, insane, agenda.

I think the fact they're thinking about the Alien/Aliens model is at least hopeful sign that they're trying to approach it intelligently. But, as always, most experiments fail, and the odds are against it—especially with Marshall gone, Lionsgate's rejection, "little" monsters, etc.

Theron said...

Eh, I don't think
The De2cent with be Decent.

What's with all the numbers in names? It's like they're all titles to Prince songs or something...

Robert H. said...

What is the point?!
(esp. if you've seen the original ending on the 'Uncut' DVD)

MONEY.


Are people THAT stupid to be sucked into something like this?

YOU BETCHA.

ARBOGAST said...

I rented the first Desent and watched it at a friends. Both of my friends were making fun of it the entire time, laughing and such.

Aren't you glad you don't know these people?

kindertrauma said...

This could be really good. I like the idea of an ALIENS approach. I know most sequels stink but would any of us want to live in an alternate universe where there was no DAWN OF THE DEAD, no EVIL DEAD2 or...eegad no FRIDAY the 13th part 2? I just gave myself the heebie-jeebies just imagining such a hell dimension!

Queen Anthai said...

To: Anonymous
Re: The Rage

...Misty Mundae is acting in a serious movie?

Old Dark Housekeeper said...

See, the problem here is that they're dragging Sarah back down in the hole.

I hated the winging loon Sarah, and spent the film in escalating amounts of frustration that Marshall didn't pull a Marion Crane on her character.

Now, Juno...

Ah... now there's a fine character to figure out how to get out of the hole alive (didn't see her die, right?) and then back in for the sequel...

Pierce said...

I personally can't wait to see the new and unique ways that they attempt to use the 2 in the movie posters. I mean thats going to be awesome, right? ...Right?!?

Theron said...

Hey, Erin Brown (ie, Misty Mundae) has turned into quite a good actress...

Anonymous said...

Does anyone want to comment on "the signal" if you have seen it. I don't need much more than whether you thought it was good or not as a recommendation. Stacie did you review this one? Thanks.

Stacie Ponder said...

I'm with Theron- Misty Mundae is beginning to transition to more...err..."legitimate" roles, and she's doing it well. She blew Angela Bettis out of the water in Sick Girl, in my opinion, and I love Angela Bettis.

Like I said, it's all useless speculation at this point- as Nate said, there could be perfectly good reasons why Lionsgate isn't involved, and as Bill said, maybe the script will be alright. To me, it's a film that doesn't need a sequel; the ending didn't immediately cry out "Get ready for Part 2!". The fact that Neil Marshall isn't involved at all worries me...but then, I was worried about the Dawn of the Dead remake and I ended up loving it.

anonymous, I haven't seen The Signal yet, and I've heard conflicting reviews- I know 2 people who loved it, and 1 person who absolutely hated it. I never agree with the hater on anything, though, so I'm thinking I'll end up liking it. If I wasn't such a cheapskate, I'd probably go see it.

Theron said...

I agree with Stacie here. "Sick Girl" was ruled by Misty/Erin. Bettis is an amazing actor, but I don't know what she was doing in "Sick Girl."

ARBOGAST said...

Bettis is an amazing actor, but I don't know what she was doing in "Sick Girl."

Boy, do I un-agree. I think Angela Bettis is the worst actor, not from lack of talent but from personal choice. "Sick Girl" was nothing but a prolonged Lilith Crane impersonation (I get it, she's mannish) while MAY was just one unending train of preciousness. She was better in THE TOOLBOX MURDERS, which stank up the screen on every other level, but generally speaking, when I see Angela Bettis coming, I can feel my bowels loosen to a chicken broth consistency.

Ray said...

Late to the party, but WHAT. THE. FUCK?!!!?? De2cent? Jesus jumping goddamm Christ, I hate myself for having typed that fucking title. And how exactly do you market this film outside the US, given the original ending? There's no fucking way Sarah, even if she survived, would go back to 'look for survivors'. Because her friends are all dead, and she knows that.

And anyone who claims they weren't genuinely scared at least once during The Descent either wasn't watching, or is lying.

sarah said...

INT. BOARD ROOM

Suit 1 "Sequels are hot. The kids love sequels"
Suit 2 "You know what else the kids love? They love changing perfectly functional words into their own language by adding or removing letters!"
Suit 1 "You mean like on the world wide web, when the kids say things like teh instead of the? Or pwned?"
Suit 2 "Exactly!"
Suit 1 "How do we make this work for our sequel?"
Suit 2 "Well, we can't take out the S or the C - it would just be confusing and change the meaning of the word...hmmm"
Suit 1 " I know! The letter S kind of looks like a 2!"
Suit 2 "It does??"
Suit 1 "I'm dyslexic"
Suit 2 "This works! I'm loving this!"
Me " Kill yourselves."

SCENE

jervaise brooke hamster said...

when i was a kid i remember falling head over heels in love with kim richards when i saw escape to witch mountain in `75 (the same year heather was born) i thought she was the most gorgeous little darlin` i`d ever seen, and when i sneaked in to see halloween 3 years later i had the same feelings about her sister, when i watch ETWM now though i just think "kim, you`re such a cheeky little heather o`rourke impersonator".