FINAL GIRL explores the slasher flicks of the '70s and '80s...and all the other horror movies I feel like talking about, too. This is life on the EDGE, so beware yon spoilers!

Mar 26, 2009

I Know What You Did That Night After the Party

Though the release date lies in October, the trailer for Sorority Row is up now. Behold!



The original film, House on Sorority Row (1983), is certainly a forebear of I Know What You Did Last Summer and films of that ilk. You know the kind, where someone ends up dead and a group of teens vows to take the secret to their graves but then someone starts killing the teens and what if the person they buried wasn't really dead and aaaaaaahhh! That kind. Judging from the trailer, Sorority Row is going to fall closer in line to I Know and (SIGH) the fucking abysmal April Fool's Day remake than the film on which it's actually based, which put a nice little spin on the formula. But who knows? It's just a trailer. All I can say for sure is that it seems the broad with the upside-down eyes from The Hills gets killed early (good) and for now, the movie has an R rating (also good). No matter what, Sorority Row boasts Carrie effing Fisher and I'm not gonna lie- I'll go see it just for her.

Sorority Row...excited? Apathetic? Gassy?

22 comments:

Phantom of Pulp said...

They give away a very important plot point.

I hate how trailers these days reveal everything.

Fisher appears to have found her niche.

Wings said...

I liked the trailer when I saw it. Looking forward to this, hoping it's good.

And yeah, I mean CARRIE FISHER. Even if it sucks, she will still be in it.

BJ-C said...

I'm also going to see it just for Carrie Fisher, and Audrina needs to never be put on screen...ever. I personally like the whole "kill a teen and hide her body" better when it was done by Rose McGowan and had a jawbreaker involved...that wasn't a horror film *sigh*. although

Gestalt said...

LOL!! I think I would only watch it, because Carrie Fisher is in it.

JA said...

Can I get a fifth "I am only going to see this movie because of Carrie Fisher"? I am only going to see this movie because of Carrie Fisher. I haven't even watched the trailer yet just because I keep hearing how terrible it is and I don't want to make myself doubt my commitment to Carrie Fisher like that.

Margarita said...

I'm not gonna lie, the trailer got me pretty juiced for it. :D At the very least, it looks like it could be some good old fashioned mindless fun! Sometimes that's exactly what I'm craving ya know?

Ryan said...

I saw that trailer last week and I think the movie looks AWFUL. I'm not a huge fan of the original, but I always loved the idea of an evil housemother that the girls all hate, and it looks like they eschewed that idea entirely. Of course I haven't seen the film yet, but judging from the trailer, Carrie Fisher is completely wasted in her role. I demand old crone makeup on that woman ASAP!!

bwana said...

Is the original the one where the housemother has a mongoloid son? And somebody hallucinates a walking cane spinning by itself? I don't remember and could be completely wrong.

Brad Nelson said...

Carrie Fisher running a house with fifty crazy bitches?

Carrie Fisher being NOT AFRAID BECAUSE OF THESE HARD FACTS.

No matter how minor these points may play out in the actual film, that is enough to get me to see anything.

RC said...

b) Apathetic.

Carrie got my juices flowing 20 years ago but these days... I dunno... am I the only one that thinks she sounds like a man in that trailer?

BTW - I don't honestly think Sorority Row could suck anywhere near as much as the April Fool's Day remake.

Stacie Ponder said...

Dude, she sounds like she's done nothing but chain smoke for 20 years! Which is entirely possible. But she's hardly ever in anything and she's just so fucking cool...she'll make this worth it even if the film is a big pile of dook.

NOTHING could suck as much as the AFD remake, except maybe for the Black Christmas remake.

RC said...

I'm getting a higher suckometer reading on the April Fool's Day remake than I am on the Black Christmas remake.

B.E. Earl said...

I thought that the Black Christmas remake was high art compared to the Prom Night remake. But that is like comparing two separate pieces of dog crap. One might be a bit more aesthetically pleasing, but in the end they are both shit.

This one looks like another piece of remake doodoo. Woof!

Elwood Jones said...

I've not seen the original yet, but might have to give it a look now, so I'll be ready to compare the two.
Honestly though I thought the trailer looked pretty good, even if it is yet another remake, plus it's intresting to see more of a mixture character wise, rather than just having a bunch of dumb blonde running around screaming. Perhaps this is Hollywood easing audiences back into the old character groups, that used to be in every horror film I.E The Jock, The Nerd, The Funny One etc etc.

Now if I could just figure out what the track was at the begining of the trailer?

John said...

"broad with he upside down eyes"...lol...I always liked to refer to her as ceiling eyes. What the eff is she looking at?!

goblin said...

I haven't seen the original yet, but the remake looks awfully, awfully mediocre.

David Robson said...

Brad Nelson speaks sooth.

But I'd see a movie called THE GIRL WITH THE UPSIDE-DOWN EYES no matter what I thought of the trailer.

Reel Whore said...

I'm going with C) Gassy. This looks pretty horrible. My gut's already churning knowing that even though it looks terrible, I will be seeing this hot mess anyway. Not too many great options this year.

Stacie Ponder said...

I probably shouldn't make fun of Upside-Down Eyes because she can't help it- and I'm not exactly making fun, but it weirds me out.

Now I feel bad.

The big question, though, is whether or not the Carrie Fisherness of this whole affair will be able to get me to sit through something starring Rumer Willis.

Justin B. said...

I've never seen the original, sadly, but I've gotta say that this one looks pretty effing abysmal.

Although yes, Carrie Fisher does make me want to see the movie, especially that last line she has in the trailer.

Not that a movie looking like it's gonna suck has ever really stopped me from watching it anyway.

Steve. x Mark. x Runciman said...

Truth Be Told, THe Original Sucked in the first place. No reason to think this will be any better.

xx

cattleworks said...

I, too, thought THE GIRL WITH THE UPSIDE DOWN EYES sounded like a movie title (hmmm, picture Sam the Eagle from the Muppet Show saying that)... some 70s italian movie.